And then it was Christmas

Christmas went as usual.  It was Jacob's first Christmas and like every other baby's first Christmas he was satisfied with the wrapping paper and bows. 

Lillian and Samuel hit the jackpot for Christmas between the two families and Santa. 

I feel like pictures didn't really turn out very well.  We weren't great at taking any and then I just managed to look 9 months pregnant in every single one.  So, because I'm feeling a bit vain today, no pictures except for the ice storm we had the weekend before Christmas.

We spent Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with my Grandparents (while my family took off to Red River, NM). Then Christmas dinner with the in-laws.  We watched light displays, went to our favorite places, decorated sugar cookies, opened pajamas, read our favorite Christmas stories, and watched our favorite movies. 

Overall it was a pretty simple and relaxing Christmas season. 

Shenanigans and such

A lot has happened since my last post.  Mainly mischief by my two oldest.  Honestly.

There's been coloring on the walls (just as I thought we had moved out of that stage).  Coloring the piano keys purple, fortunately with a washable marker.  Coloring my counter-tops, unfortunately with a wood stain marker.

And painting with hand sanitizer.  Let's not forget that.  

Then they ran away from me while walking home from the park.  I finally had to hide behind the neighbor's car and wait to ambush them.

Then they broke out of the back yard and decided they wanted to turn on the sprinkler with the hose in the front yard.  (We have been enjoying weather in the 60's lately).  When they couldn't figure out how to attach the sprinkler they took the hose and pulled it across the street, each kid standing on opposite sides of the street and shouting through the hose using it as a telephone line.  And when they were told to get in the house they obeyed... but then locked me out.  Fortunately, KeLei was visiting and was inside the house.

(And this is when I think of my dear friend Whitney and how often she gets the cops called on her kids and how I've NEVER even had a concerned neighbor show up on my doorstep which kind of concerns me...).  

Oh and ballet lessons for Miss Lillian.  I filmed her Cookie Dance, but it didn't turn out blog worthy.  First there is shakey-cam, which is my fault and then not focusing, which is the camera's fault.  I should have just stuck with my iPad.

Also, there was Samuel's music program in which he refused to stand up there and sing, instead slowly inched his way to where we were sitting watching him.  So we just have video of all of his classmates singing.

Besides the two older ones keeping me on my toes, we've also done a min-renovation to our kitchen.  Which I will show before and after pictures once we get through the holidays and I get my kitchen clean and cute looking.

I started a job.  A part-time job in the evenings when Carlin is home.  It gets me out of the house and now I have a little spending money.  Which I want to spend at my job, HomeGoods, to spruce up my house.  Sigh.
 
There have also been ice/snow storms, KeLei visiting before heading off to college, a ward boundary change, birthdays and just everyday life.

And during all of this is my youngest smiling his way through life.  Learning how to crawl.  Growing and growing.  Getting excited when you walk into the room and always willing to cuddle. 

Halloween Version 2013

Thanks to a consignment sale I scored costumes that I didn't have to do anything with except add some yellow tape to Samuel's.  And let me tell you, with the way this year has gone and how scatter-brained I have become I needed simple costumes this year.

So, we were invaded by a pumpkin...

And he's the cutest pumpkin I ever did see!

I love this picture because both Daddy and Jacob have the EXACT same smiles.  He truly is Carlin's mini-me.

And then a Princess and a Fireman joined by their friends Tinker Bell and Elmo.

Lillian, impressively, hiked all over the neighborhood in those plastic high heels (they didn't even have a strap on the heel).  She came home with blisters on her feet, but that didn't matter because she was a princess.  I swear she is going to be one of those girls who doesn't even think twice about wearing high heels to school.

A cute couple in our ward who also live in our neighborhood hands out hot dogs to the neighborhood kids (as well as candy) so our little brood took a break for hot dogs, chips and root beer.  Yum.

We also have another couple in our ward who live down the street from us (I know, we have two families who live close to us - it's awesome!) and every year she makes little goody bags for the kids.  This year was candy, coloring books, little toys and socks.

Something new this year was the Halloween Fairy.  We told the kids to eat all the candy they wanted because the Halloween Fairy was visiting our house and taking all the candy and leaving a present behind in its place.  They got books, a Dinosaur Angry Birds book for Samuel and a Doc McStuffins book for Lilly. 

Fall Happenings

Thanks to the planning of others I've managed to fit in some fun activities this October.  First was a trunk-or-treat at my BIL's ward.  The kids thought it was so silly trick-or-treating from people's cars.  I did not take any pictures, partly because we forgot our camera and partly because I want to save costume pics for Halloween.  :)

Jacob chilling with the wipes.  Good times.

Saturday we went to Pumpkinville at the Myriad Gardens and met up with some friends we haven't seen in forever!  The children's area was all decorated with candy corns and spider eggs and owls.  We painted pumpkins, played bean bag toss, enjoyed the company of friends and took some awesome group pics.

Carlin was chasing Nate and Brandie's son while Nate was holding Jacob...

I obviously had my hands full and Carlin was holding Lillian so Nate still has Jacob in this pic too. 

Tuesday I dropped Lilly and Jacob off for a play date while I chaperoned Samuel's school field trip.  There were more than enough parents so it was just me and Samuel enjoying the beautiful day together and getting some much needed one-on-one time. 

A hay tunnel - Samuel kept jumping out and scaring me!

In the corn maze with school friends Ryan and Ira.

Playing in the tires.  Also a good look at the slide and the petting zoo.

Tonight we decorate pumpkins and tomorrow it's Halloween.  Holy guacamole, where has the time gone?! 

Adjusting

Adjusting to three kids - fairly easy.  Way easier than two.  At least for me.

Adjusting to post-baby body after three kids?  Not so easy.  In fact, it's rather depressing.

Remembering that I now have three kids and one is a baby...  seems to be rather difficult.  Which is why I thought doing house projects and starting a part-time job was a good idea.

And to put the cherry on top?  Carlin is in Milwaukee this week.  He is once again traveling in his supposed to be non-traveling job.  And what have I realized? 

That I'm STILL adjusting to the new dynamic of our family.  That I do have to accept the things I cannot change.  That 5 months isn't nearly enough time to be back to normal - so why did I think it would happen faster? 

But mostly, I have realized how much I miss my husband.  I just want him home. Next to me. 

"When the skies are grey and all the doors are closing
And the rising pressure makes it hard to breathe
When all I need's a hand to stop the tears from falling
I will find him, I’ll find him next to me"
-Next to Me, Emeli Sande

Kindergarten!

Samuel started Kindergarten two weeks ago. 

It's full-day.  His teacher is incredible.  He thrives on the structure. 

He's happy.  I'm happy.  It's awesome.

Lillian, however, is not happy.  She wants her best friend home to play or wants to be at school too.  Being left behind is just not cool.

Remembering

If you ever get my voice-mail you'll hear something that goes like this: "Hi, this is Aubrey, I can't get to the phone right now so leave a message.  Smile and have a great day."  It's been like that for years now.  Some people love it.  Some people, like Mom, tell me it's time to change it.  But the thing is, there's a story behind it.  And the story begins with one of the most remarkable women I've ever known.  Kathleen Briggs.

I first met Sister Briggs when I was thirteen or so and she was serving as my youth leader.  She was one of those women who was educated, beautiful and kind.  She made you feel like you were the most important person in the room and when you spoke to her she made it feel like she had nothing better to do that day than listen to you.

Around the same time she came into my life she was also diagnosed with a vicious form of breast cancer.  It was aggressive and so the doctors attacked it aggressively.  She never complained though.  She always showed up to church with a smile on her face, even if it was a tired smile.  She was in the Young Womens for a majority of my teenage years and during those years she went in and out of remission.  The cancer just wouldn't quit and neither would she.

During those years she taught me a lot.  She taught me how to laugh at myself.  If I was embarrassed by something that had happened at school that day she would share an even more embarrassing story, like when she fell down the grand entrance staircase at BYU while attending a formal or the time the wind blew her wig off while giving a speech outside and everybody started chasing it.

She also taught me to never give up and life wasn't that bad.  How can you complain about teenage woes when you know someone whose fingernails are falling off due to chemotherapy? She was always there even though she held down a full-time job and was very tired by the end of the day. 

I'll never forget the story she told how Audrie had held the door open for her one day after church and she almost wept with gratitude.  She said she was so tired that day that the thought of opening the heavy doors to get out of the church was so overwhelming she just stood there not moving.  I learned that day that simple acts go a long way.

I graduated high school, went to college and got married.  Soon I was back in my home ward and Sister Briggs was now the Stake Relief Society President and I was her visiting teacher.  You could say I was only a little intimidated.  I fumbled through the message, shared my testimony and asked how I could help.  She was going through another round of extremely intensive chemo and informed me that if the cancer didn't kill her the chemo would.  I felt so helpless as I watched her become sicker and sicker.  How was I supposed to serve a woman who had served me for so many years?  Once again she taught me there are many different ways to serve and I found my own way to show her my love and appreciation.

During this time I often called her and often got her answering machine.  Her message went something like "I hope you're smiling and having a great day." 

I'm not sure exactly when I adopted her message but I wanted to spread the same kind of cheer and love she gave to everyone so willingly.  Soon after she moved to be closer to family.  A year or so later I was sitting at my desk, pregnant with Samuel when I received the email.  Kathleen had passed away. 

So, I probably won't ever change my voice-mail.  It's my way of honoring her.  To remember to live my life to the fullest and to smile, because today is a GREAT day.

All About Jacob

Can you believe Jacob will be 3 months old in 4 days?!  Neither can I.

Jacob was born sometime around 7:30am via c-section.  He came out not crying... The doctor reassured me he was fine.  I wasn't completely convinced until I heard that first little wail.  Carlin said he had the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck once.

From day one he was holding up his head.  He's a strong little one.  He's also our little cuddler.  Carlin always wanted a cuddler and he finally got one.  He is still happy when he is cuddled next to Mommy or Daddy and will sit there perfectly still and content.  Neither Samuel or Lillian were like that so we are a little beside ourselves.

Interesting little fact: poor kid had to wear his sister's pajamas those first few days because I couldn't find Samuel's newborn PJs. 

Speaking of differences, he was born with a head-full of dark brown hair and still has it - although it seems to be turning auburn a bit.  He also likes his pacifier which is such a relief.  It's seriously like a mute button!

He doesn't like to be put down much but is getting better as he gets older.  He's especially warming up to the swing. We struggled with nursing so much that we finally elected to switch to formula to lower the stress of the whole family.  We are still trying to figure out his little digestion - he seems to have acid reflux and prefers certain brands of formula (like Similac over Enfamil).

Overall little Jacob is a happy baby.  He has started to smile in response to your smiles and has even started to laugh.  I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE little baby laughs.  They are the best, happiest things in the world. 

He's sleeping through the night right now.  We put him down around 8pm and he wont' wake up till 5 or 6am.  I'm liking that a lot.  Now if I could just get his older sister to sleep through the night, we would be golden...

A little bit on the delivery: Not much to tell.  It was a planned c-section due to previous c-sections.  I had a spinal block and got the shakes a bit but nothing even close to what I had with Lillian.  This time I had extreme itching especially on my face.  It was so bad that by that afternoon my nose swollen and bleeding, my chin and cheeks had scratch marks all over and I had rubbed other patches of skin raw.  Finally a nurse noticed and gave me some Benadryl.  Turned out they had given me morphine to help with the pain and I was having a reaction.  The recovery was horrible and I was pretty convinced I was going to die of the after-contraction pains.

Now we are doing pretty good.  I'm exhausted but things get better every day.  The kids love Jacob and even make up songs about how much they love him.  It goes something like this "Jacob I love you, Jacob I love you, I love you Jacob."  Very original.  Lillian is always showering him with kisses and trying to pick him up and hold him.  Samuel just looks at Jacob and says "Awww, he's so cute."  Sometimes he will let Jacob hold his fingers.

And that's Jacob, our little cuddle-bug.

Motherhood: A Confession

"Motherhood is my style" said Heather Ann Johnson.  She's a blogger and I like to read her thoughts and advice in motherhood and family life.  She recently gave a speech on motherhood which you can listen to at Family Volley.  She explains that becoming a mother was something she always wanted.

Which got me thinking, that's not the first time I've heard that.  It seems many of my friends just wanted to be a Mom and as I've watched them become Moms and do the Mom-thing they are so GOOD at it.  It seems to come easy to them and I envy them, because simply put, I didn't dream of becoming a Mom.  And it's hard.

Seriously hard.

There are days I would rather go through finals again than face being a Mom. 

Even as a child I never wanted to be a mother.  I wanted to be a teacher, an astronaut and for a small period an actress/performer of some sorts.  But mainly an astronaut.  I was going to be the first woman on the moon, the first person to Mars and then come back and write about it.  Which would then lead me to be a journalist for the National Geographic in which I would travel the world. 

And then things changed, the Lord had a different path for me.  Carlin came into my life and before I could blink we had three kids.  And I'm a stay-home Mom and it's the hardest thing I've ever done. 

Not because it's tedious, redundant, and never-ending.  And not because potty-training might kill me.  But because Motherhood is NOT my style.  And I want it to be, I really do. 

But it's like wearing a dress that's too tight and too small and you just feel self-conscious and are constantly pulling it down or up and it feels like you might suffocate in it. 

That's how motherhood is for me, sometimes it feels like I might suffocate.

Does it make me love my children any less?  No.  I love them.  But my love for them doesn't make it any easier.  And that's the hones truth.

Dear Jacob,

You turned a month old yesterday and yet there is no post and no pictures of you on my blog.  Some might argue it's because you're a third child and third children simply get overlooked.  I promise that's not the case.   The main reason there are no posts or pictures is because I spend the majority of my time holding you.  Most of the time I don't mind, you are my last baby and I want to cherish every moment with you.  It also helps that you do not like to be put down.

Born: May 6, 7lbs 15 oz, 19.5 inches

This past month has also been quite the eventful one.  There were lots of celebrations, you were born, Samuel finished preschool and turned 5 and your father and I celebrated 7 years of marriage.  In between all of that we experienced severe weather.  An F5 tornado came within several miles of our house, less than 2 miles from your Daddy's workplace, across the street from your Aunt Samantha, and just barely missed your Aunt Heather.  You were 2 weeks old exactly.  For the second day in a row I huddled with you and Lillian in our little closet under the stairs whispering prayers for the safety of all those we loved, while your brother sought shelter at school.  11 days later we were again running for shelter, this time at a neighbor's house for they have an underground storm shelter.  This storm also produced an F5 tornado, along with several smaller tornadoes - one of which hit your Daddy's work leaving them without power for almost a week - and severe flooding.

That's about when your Daddy and I looked at each other and thought for the first time since having children "what kind of world have we brought our precious children into and how do we protect them?"

I am not sure what the future holds for you little Jacob, but I do know one thing.  You are a gift from the Lord and I have to trust that He will keep you and your siblings safe.  I do not doubt that you were supposed to come to our little family at this time and you have been our little light in the darkness. Aunts and Uncles have sought you out to hold you and bring peace as we learned of the devastation of natural disasters, Grandmas and Grandpas have come forward to support, help and love.

I might be slacking in an outwardly show of your importance to this family, but you have filled our heart and home with your presence and I can't imagine a time without you.

Welcome to this world, Baby Jacob!

He was born with a head full of brown hair and still has it - I can't believe it after having two bald kids!

Godzilla Samuel

Samuel likes Godzilla.

He likes building things.  Towers, castles, roads, train tracks.

He likes to destroy them after he is done playing with them.

Daddy is really a 5 year old in a 30 year old body who wanted to film Samuel in slow-motion. 

These were the results:

I'm so excited!

And I just can't hide it.  I'm about to lose control and I think I like it, I like it. 

Because...

In less than 2 weeks we will be welcoming baby number 3. 

And I can honestly say this is the most excited I've ever been about welcoming a child into this world. 

With Samuel I was just terrified of labor and delivery and realizing that I had NO idea what to do with a baby.

With Lillian I was terrified of having two kids 19 months apart, another c-section, and having a girl.

With this one - I'm just done being pregnant.  I know it's going to be hard adjusting to three kids, having a newborn wake-up multiple times a night, my two older kids waking up freakishly early in the morning, recovering from a c-section and all the mayhem that comes with a major life change. 

But I've never been more ready - at least mentally and emotionally.  All the baby stuff is still in boxes and rooms need to be cleaned and beds need to be upgraded, but that will happen when it happens. 

My arms ache for the tininess of the sweet little baby, to look into its big eyes, hold its little hands and count its little toes.  I also can't wait to find out what gender this baby is! What do you think?

Most people in the family are thinking it's going to be a boy.  I don't have any opinion either way.  This pregnancy was seriously unlike any other pregnancy I've experienced and I can honestly say I have no clue what I'm having.  

That's all for now people, Samuel is home from school and begging for a snack because he "is still hungry." 

My Juvenile Delinquent

Lillian likes to TP the house.

She's quite fast at it.  Running around the house with rolls of toilet paper while Samuel follows behind trying to keep it all in a neat pile.

She was on her 10th roll when I found her. 

I wouldn't have known how many rolls she was on (she tries to hide the evidence) if I hadn't taken the trash out yesterday.  I started counting the tubes of toilet paper that were trying to lie there discreetly. 

If this is foreshadowing of her teenage years I'm in BIG trouble. 

 

28 to Win It

Last week was my birthday and my husband decided to be all cute and planned a game for me.  I had to complete all the tasks in 28 seconds or 1 minute 28 seconds (depending on the difficulty) to win the "prize" or my present.  :)

My brother took the kids that evening so we could enjoy a little date together and the festivities began.

My first challenge was to balance three cardboard bricks on my head in 28 seconds.  I didn't really accomplish this challenge.  Apparently, my head comes to a point.  Literally.   I did eventually get all three of them to balance for a tenth of a second and Carlin counted it, it was my birthday after all.  (And yes, Laura, that is the sign you made for my birthday several years ago.  I still have it. :))

The next challenge was to flick 8 pens into a bin placed 28 inches away in 28 seconds.  If you look closely you can see a silver pen in midair by my arm.  I finished this with time to spare.

Round three was a "hint" round where I had to pull mini-M&Ms our of mini-stockings but couldn't use my hands to pull the stocking off.  I ended up using my hip and the table.  Carlin said that was cheating but I argued that he only said I couldn't use my hands. 

 

 Round four was tearing 8 sheets of newspaper in half using only my feet.  Luckily I have finger toes.  Unfortunately, my hips have been uber-sore with this pregnancy and I could barely walk afterwards. 

Round five was the last round and another hint round.  I had to stack 4 apples on top of each other and get them to balance for a few seconds.  This was another one that took longer than one minute and 28 seconds and I had to use an unexpected lifeline and got help from my husband.  :P 

Finally, I had to choose a prize found under one of three boxes.  I chose correctly and won...

A mini-iPad!  Sometimes, my husband really does spoil me.  It's great and I've spending far too much time on it playing games.  The kids are also enjoying it.

For dinner Carlin took me to the baby's favorite place - Ray's Barbeque.  Seriously the best barbeque in town, maybe even in the state.  And I love, love their okra.  We split a homemade strawberry cake for dessert. 

Overall, it was a great birthday spent with the people I love the best. 

The One and Only...

A couple of weeks ago my SIL, Heather, invited me to a dinner and lecture at the University.  I was excited, not only was it a night out and one of my first formal events since having kids... but the lecturer was...

Wait for it...

The one and only, David McCullough.  That's right people, the David McCullough who wrote such books as 1776 and John Adams.  And I saw him, living and breathing, in person. 

I only geeked out a bit. 

The specific book he talked about was Truman.  But it wasn't all "look at how awesome my book is" it was more about how important it is to educate our children on American History.

I have a limited knowledge of American History, but I'll brush up on it (probably by reading more of his books) and fortunately, Miss Heather (my SIL, in case you forgot) happens to be graduating this Spring with a degree in History and then going on for her Masters in the Fall.  And now that I've mentioned it I would like to give her a shout-out for not only being impressively smart and motivated, but for taking that leap to Grad School (I'm just a little bit jealous...). 


And here's a picture of me at 33 weeks - with my fabulous haircut and my amazing grandparents.

Pat on the Back

Took Lillian to the museum today!

Score 1 for the Momma.

When we got home I asked her if she wanted a snack.  She said, "yes, I want apples."

Score number 2!  The kid loves apples.

This inspired me to eat a healthy snack too.  Baby pickles, cheese and a mandarin orange.  Yumm.

Lillian wanted an orange too.

Score 3 and 4 for me.  I was giving myself high fives and pats on the back.  Oh yah!  My kids are healthy.

Samuel got home from school.  "What do you want for a snack?"  I asked.  He's not much of a fruit kid but he loves fruit snacks or carrots or broccoli. 

Samuel: "Chocolate chips and marshmallows."

Back to reality.  This is their usual snack with either crackers or popcorn to make myself feel better.

Who was I kidding?  I was eye-ing those powdered sugar donuts I had bought myself on impulse the other day anyway.

It's all about balance right?

My Life Without Garlic

Have I mentioned how this baby does not like garlic?  Really this baby doesn't like much, except bar-b-que, fried okra, and cookies.  But ninja-baby really does not like garlic.

Pretty much it comes right back up, but if I'm lucky it just makes me sick for several days and Carlin gets to listen to me moan and groan about how wretched my life is and how I'm never getting pregnant again.  Ever.

You would be surprised how many foods garlic shows up in - it's like people put garlic in everything.  At first I was just miserable.  I wasn't up for much cooking and all my favorite soups and store-bought, pre-made foods had garlic in them.

But now I cook more and an interesting thing has happened.  I've realized how other herbs and spices taste WITHOUT garlic.  Suddenly basil is sweet and charming, thyme has a kick to it I didn't know that little spice could have, cumin has a wonderful smoky flavor that can save my lame attempts at taco seasoning.

I also have a new view on restaurants.  Are they really good or are they just hiding behind a hideous amount of butter, cheese and garlic?  For example, Carlin took me out to Zio's the other day and I ordered a shrimp in lemon butter sauce except I had to omit the sauce and ask for no seasoning on the shrimp.

The dish came out with angel hair pasta, shrimp, artichoke hearts, tomatoes, and mushrooms in a plain butter sauce.  And guess what?  I could taste the dish.  The juicy shrimp, the bitter artichoke, the out-of-season-lackluster tomatoes, and the always wonderful sauteed mushrooms.

Now instead of adding an extra dash of garlic to my dishes I'm discovering new spices and use of old spices and loving it.

Oh - and ninja-baby is the official name of this baby because it is seriously trying to karate chop its way out of my stomach.  It even startles Carlin it kicks so hard and has almost made me pee my pants on several occasions when using my bladder as a punching bag.

Sleepless in America*

My kids have been a bit crazy lately.

They've been impossible to put to bed.  Many nights ending up in our bed.

They wake up multiple times during the night and crawl into bed with us.

Last night I got up with Lillian.  As soon as I got her settled down Samuel woke up.  As soon as Samuel settled down, Lillian would get agitated again.  This went on for a while.

I guess I gave up at one point because I woke up this morning with Samuel's feet propped on my stomach while he took over my pillow and Lillian poking me in the eye.   

Didn't help that I couldn't get to sleep till 1am anyway.  Which has happened several times this week.

During the day they are like these little balls of frantic energy that just get into everything.

They made "dinner" the other night with mud and all of the fruit from the fridge plus carrots.

I have a trail of mud from the back door to the bathroom.

Even though I've put away/hidden every single soap, shampoo, toothpaste type item they still manage to find the one I missed.

Lillian insists she's old enough for red high heels and make-up.

 

I can't even begin to put into words how exhausted I am - Carlin has come home many times this week to find me curled up in bed with chocolate and a book.  By 5 o'clock there is no point in trying to manage the mess anymore.

*Sleepless in America is a book I'm reading - check out my GoodReads button thingy on the side for more details.

Logic

Lillian:  "Mommy, guess what?!"
Me: "What?"
Lillian "When the sun goes down it turns into the moon!"
Me: "Oh really?"
Lillian: "Yes, and when the moon goes down it turns into the sun!"

Makes sense to me.

Baby News

I just realized I'm 24 weeks (or about 5 months) along and besides announcing I'm pregnant, haven't really said anything else about this pregnancy. 

Here's how I'm doing:

1.  This is the first week in 24 weeks I haven't had to take Zofran (which is for nausea... ahh, how I love you Zofran).  In fact, this is the first time in 24 weeks I have felt half-way decent.

2.  I'm still very, very tired.  And finally found out why.  Yesterday my doctor's office called and said I had passed the glucose test (yay!) but my hemoglobin is low.  Apparently I need more iron.

3. The baby is healthy and kicking and Carlin has felt it move a couple of times.  The kids, however, want nothing to do with Mommy's weird, moving stomach.

4. No, I'm not carrying twins and Yes, I still have 4 months left.  Sigh.

5.  Belly pictures?  Not right now, I've gained lots of weight plus haven't showered yet today, so I'm not feeling particularly attractive.  However, my SIL Heather, helped pick out a cute dress that I will put on and show off through pics.  Perhaps after I get my hair-cut.  Maybe that will make me feel less frumpy. 

Lillian is 3!

How's it going world? 

Since I use my blog as my journal I wanted to post pictures of Lillian's birthday.  But what I really wanted to talk about is potty training and since I don't have much energy these days (you try potty training two kids while pregnant...) I'm combining the two posts.  So, here is my Worst-Mom-of-the-Year confession in hopes that it will make other moms feel a little bit better about potty training.

Samuel posing with the awesome strawberry cupcakes.

I hate it.  I'm quite convinced it is of the devil.  It is the one thing I've been dreading since we had our precious Samuel 4.5 years ago.  October of 2011 we tried potty training.  After reading countless books and asking the advice of experienced moms out there, I decided to try the 3-day method.  This is where you ship off your other kids to family or friends, shove tons of juice down the potty-training kid and then stick by their side 24/7.  This works the best if you have tile/laminate type flooring or it's summer and you have a backyard.  When the child goes pee you exclaim "Oh look!  You're going pee!" And you pick them up and take them to the toilet.  every. single. time.  Until they get it.  This might possibly have been the worse method for me (who has been known to be OCD about the cleanliness of her house) to choose, but I did it.  I rolled up the rugs, put layers of towels on the couches and moved the majority of toys to the dining room.  Halfway through day 2 we had success.  Samuel was potty trained (#1 not #2, that comes later).  I rejoiced and thought to myself "Yesssss!  I CAN do this!" 

Lillian was so excited she kept trying to blow-out the candles before we were done singing.

And then we hit the regression period.  I had been warned this would happen.  I calmly took it in stride.  The number of accidents increased.  And increased.  And increased.  Soon Samuel wasn't going to the potty at all and I was going crazy.

And I mean crazy.  It got to the point I wanted to shove his nose in it like you do a cat or dog.  We took a little breather at that time and switched to Pull-ups.  (Don't worry, no need to call DHS).

I've tried EVERYTHING since.  Seriously.  You name it, I've done it.  With both kids, because Lillian wants to be just like her big brother.  I've done sticker charts, rewards, little treats every time they went, setting up a movie in the bathroom, making a big deal out of it when they went, being encouraging, calling Grandma, promising they could pick out any toy they wanted if they would just go in the potty.  And I was serious.  I was so desperate I was willing to spend ANYTHING to get my kids to potty train. 

Oh and what about making them clean it up and change themselves? 

Yep, I've done that too.  Lillian enjoys it a little too much and gets excited about putting clothes in the laundry.  I've left them in the wet clothes too.  Samuel doesn't even notice 95% of the time.  Not even kidding. 

Uncle Mitchell, Aunt Heather, Jenny and Nick (who aren't technically related, but we consider them family).

The only thing I hadn't done was put the potty chair in front of the TV.  But I wasn't going to cross that line.  I just couldn't bring the bathroom to the living room.  Besides, seeing how (not) successful the DVD in the bathroom was... I was pretty convinced it wasn't going to work.

Grandma W and Uncle Ben

Samuel started preschool last fall and went in pull-ups.  It was just the way it was for our family.  Samuel has had a rough couple of years with hearing loss and what not and the teachers knew what was going on with him.  But then I got a phone call from his teacher right before Christmas asking where we were at with potty training.  I told her we had never really backed off, we still asked him if he needed to go, encouraged him, and gave him little treats and high fives when he did do it.  She said to start sending him to school in underwear after the new year.

I said okay... but I had my doubts.  I went and checked out a bunch of picture books and movies from the library (I'm pretty good about knowing where all this stuff is now...) and we really started pushing it again.  I made the kids watch the movies and every day we read the potty training books.  I had decided to send Samuel to school in underwear this past Monday.

Lillian was very insistent we have birthday hats.  Sadly, Daddy's head was too big.

Monday morning came and in my most enthusiastic voice I explained to Samuel that today was the day he would wear his big boy underwear.  Failure.  He screamed and cried and kicked.  I gritted my teeth and forced the underwear on him.  He ran away and changed back into the pull-ups.  I told him he could just be naked then. He sat down and cried for an hour straight.  I walked away.  Next thing I knew he was fully dressed in pull-ups and all the underwear was mysteriously missing.  He had hidden it behind the recliner in the living room.

Even Grandpa joined in on the fun (sadly we never got pictures with Grandma and Ben in their hats).

I sent him to school with a note explaining how the morning had gone.  He came home wearing his big boy underwear and a smile on his face.  A few minutes later he had an accident.  And then another.  And then another.  He had managed to stay dry at school, but it wouldn't last at home.

Tuesday morning went a little easier.  He wore his big boy underwear and Lillian insisted on wearing her big girl panties.  Oh the amount of accidents I was cleaning up that morning!  By the time lunch hit and Samuel was off to school I had gone through my entire stash of chocolate (for me, not the kids).   He came home from school dry and then promptly had an accident.  It was looking grim.

An hour later I heard the toilet flush and a very proud Samuel came running out.  "Mommy!  I went pee-pee in the potty!"  What?!  I couldn't believe it, but he was dry and remained dry for the rest of the evening. 

Samuel wanted to do everything Uncle Mitchell did...

Yesterday he had one accident and that was it.  Today, so far so good.  I'm holding my breath hoping it actually sticks this time.  I've been praying.  A lot.  Maybe the Lord is getting tired of hearing about potty training and is answering my prayers.  Lillian is half-way there.  If it keeps going like this I will have two potty-trained children before the baby gets here in May.  And hopefully no regressions. 

So there it is friends.  My 1.5 year battle with potty training.  It is true what they say, kids potty train when they are ready.  I'm just afraid mine might not ever be ready.  Keep your fingers crossed for me and remember, if I can do it you can definitely do it. 

One last picture of the yummy cupcakes...